On Aug 4, 2009, at 12:47 PM, The Cap’n wrote:

I got a prob­lem that I’m hop­ing you can help me with. You see, I recently formed a co-ed roller derby team. In our very first bout, we played another co-ed team. I think their name was the Blind But­ter­flies, or some­thing silly like that. Any­way, we com­pletely destroyed them. The score wasn’t even close, and now I feel bad for the other team for get­ting embar­rassed like that. I was think­ing that maybe I should apol­o­gize for not going eas­ier on them, but that might make them feel even worse. What should I do?

The Cap’n

The Cap’n,

As luck would have it, I, too, recently formed a co-ed roller derby team. It turns out, though, that just before our first bout, the oppos­ing team was short nearly half their ros­ter. Being the nice cap­tain that I am, I gra­ciously let them recruit one of my alter­nates. Well, wouldn’t you know it, before too long they went on a recruit­ing spree grab­bing any ringer they pos­si­bly could, includ­ing some for­mi­da­ble skaters who actu­ally did not meet the sup­posed require­ments to be on the teams! Incredible!

Rather than com­plain­ing, though, my team went through with the chal­lenge hon­or­ably rather than suc­cumb­ing to the wiles of cheat­ing. By stick­ing to our guns, we came out the true win­ners. Ha!

Just my $0.02
Julius Pleasar

P.S.—You are totally going down next year!

P.P.S.—Footage from this rivalry can be seen in three parts:

  1. Part One
  2. Part Two
  3. Part Three

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